WELCOME FOLLOWERS OF THE RELIGION OF PEACE (tm) We have guests, ladies and gentlemen, so keep your feet off the furniture. It appears this blog is beginning to receive some attention and comment from a not-unexpected direction. Submitted for your consideradion. Alfred Ghazal, who in a lucid, reasoned and compelling comment on a previous post about the three Kashmiri girls who were slaughtered for not wearing an Islamic headcovering, writes the following:

to express our feeling about the matter in brief... we say to Mr Tom Paine "go and drop dead".

Clearly Mr Ghazal is a member of some sort of group, a monarch of some description, or possibly he is Pope John-Paul II, as he refers to himself in the plural. He also fails to give precisely detailed instructions on the manner and indeed to location of my "dropping dead". I am supposed to go somewhere, but he does not say. And am I to somehow will myself to death, commit suicide in some spectacular fashion, or what? He is enigmatic on the details. This powerful and convincing argument compelled to me ask myself who Mr Ghazal was, so I could find out if he had written other similarly rational contributions to the debate. Upon perusing the details of this blog's recent hits, I chanced upon a google query which I feel may be the way he stumbled acoss us: israeli to nuke medina Hmmm, poor grasp of the English language, doesn't realise search engines don't use words like "to", obviously someone who regards Medina as being at least as important as Mecca - on balance I'd say this is a strong contender for being Mr Ghazal. An IP trace showed a lot of information, essentially locating this chap in Sydney, Australia. Now it may in fact not turn out to be him of course, I have no proof that the google search came from "Alfred Ghazal" so I will not identify the individual here. Just remember, it's all very well to gaze into the abyss, but all the time, the abyss has the ability to gaze back at you. Our second entrant is (apparently) from Algeria, land of Beu Geste, Islamic extremists, "Battle of Algiers" and more sand than you can shake a stick at. Please welcome Walid, who manages to be both brief and incomprehensible in this entry into the Bravenet guest map on my old blog, War Now!:

jewish don t want peace, they came to palestine to kill and to damage not for peace,but they will pay it expensively, be sure

Okay Walid, thanks for sharing. I note that this entry came on on the 19th, after I had just commented on an Alergian guy with strong terrorist links having been taken into custody in New Zealand. Maybe the other side IS watching. Go ahead. See how free speech and democracy work guys. Pull up a chair, take notes, the basics are quite simple really.

CAPTAIN (off) Ali la Pointe ... the house is surrounded. You haven't got a chance. Surrender. Let the child and the girl come out, then you and the other one. Leave your weapons inside. It's useless to try anything. Our machine guns are ready to fire -- you wouldn't have time. Do you understand? Ali's face is motionless and hasn't changed its expression. CAPTAIN (off) Ali, do you hear me? Listen! You are the last one. The organization is finished. All your friends are dead or in prison. Come out. You'll have a fair trial. Come out, surrender. SOUND OF FOOTSTEPS, OTHER VOICES, CHEERFUL, INCOHERENT: VOICES PARAS Why are they breathing so heavily? Fear ... Air ... They haven't got enough air inside ... And again the voice of the captain, clear and somewhat distant: CAPTAIN (off) Make up your mind, Ali? Do you want us to wall you in, or do you prefer that we blow you to pieces? ... Alright. So much the worse for you. Ali's expression is still firm; his stare is dark and sullen.

TODAY'S INSTRUCTIONS FROM ZOG HEADQUARTERS There is a website which has chanced upon the Awful Truth. Destroy it immediately. Tne Elders of Zion have spoken! Now fly my brainwashed minions. Do my twisted Judaic bidding while I protect myself with kabbalistic incantions and pore over the Talmud for more ways of using my devious semitic cunning to plot the doom of the goyim! Now go! I have to clean up the lair, the other Bilderburgers are coming over for blood-of-a-Muslim-child pastries and I need to clean up. You know what a kvetch Kissinger can be...

Several correspondents from Arabic news service Al-Jazeera picked us up and took us on a tour of one broken village. "The American bombs killed no military personnel during the campaign. This bomb here," said one reporter, as she pointed to a crater nearby, "it destroyed only a Mosque full of orphans, a family of adorable kittens, and one police officer who was just one day away from retirement." I was sickened as I looked upon the twisted wreckage of what must have been one of their religious iron sculptures, which had at one time held the shape of a large anti-aircraft gun pointing skyward. "It is, uh, symbolic," said one man nearby. "It symbolized the shooting of our prayers at Allah." [ ... ] We flew to Saudi Arabia, the sun firing the sand around us like a kiln. We rented a car and sought the help of a local guide who knew the region's languages and landscape. "It is all desert now," said the Iranian guide as we drove. He wished to remain anonymous for fear of reprisal from American corporations. "Until the 70's, this, all this around here was lush forest and good farmland. There was plenty of food and water for all. Then the American corporations came and bought all of the trees." What did you do with the money? "What money? They paid us in sand. That is how they work," said the guide.

You must also go and read David Wong's review of "The Two Towers". You MUST! Laurence, you have serious competition here...

And then, there's the cast. Obviously recasting Gandolf was a necessity after the death of Sir Ian McKellan, the actor tragically shot down by the police after a sad attempt to hold up a liquor store. But then again, why couldn't they have let the character rest in his grave after the first film? I know, I know. Gandolf sells tickets. So the writers farted out a scheme to bring him back, saying he's grown stronger in his time away and now carries the title Gandolf the White, now played by basketball star Shaquille O'Neal and introduced with this awkward scene: FRODO Gandolf! I thought you died! GANDOLF No. (He dunks a basketball) You could argue that the ten-minutes of Gandolf rapping were put into the script at Shaq's demand. I don't know. But I am quite sure that the 25 minutes of basketball were his idea.

Also, check out his "50 Reasons Wht LOTR Sucked"

Homage or theft IX? The character of the Giant Evil Flaming All-Seeing Eye was based on former President Jimmy Carter. Homage or theft X? The character of Elrond was based on Agent Smith from The Matrix. Weighty issues. AKA "Plot Hole No. 273." Even with all that walking and light eating, the character of Sam only got fatter. Realism, schmealism. Liv Tyler's immortal elf volunteers to give up her eternal life for a single romance with a human man. Could any man really be that well endowed? I find it unlikely. Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow. The most advanced civilization is that of the elves, which are long-haired, new-age types? Sorry, Mr. Jackson, but modern science has proven that in any modern civilization, hippies would be extinct.

Link via Whacking Day.

MY BID FOR IMORTALITY

Ok we all understand fisking, I have an identifiable technique of my own that Bruce has noticed. It's pretty basic, it lacks detail and doesn't lean towards over analysis. It is however quite satisfying in its own way. The working title is "Murraying", post action term to have been "Murrayed" and it goes a little something like this demo from Bruces post a little further down...

CHARGE OF THE REWRITE BRIGADE The Australian Left, sensing perhaps that the cultural tide is turning against them, have decided to launch a frontal assault on the central myth of the country's national identity - the Gallipoli campaign of World War I. It's a blatant, shameless attempt to reprogram society to their own advantage, regardless of the facts. 1) Australia should apologise to Turkey for the campaign Get fucked 2) The Gallipoli campaign was just as bad as the British invasion of aboriginal land in 1788 Oh fuck off 3) Gallipoli was an invasion, so it was evil, m'kay? Get fucking real 4) If we take an Aboriginal point of view, we should try to understand Gallipoli from the Turkish point of view too No seriously, get fucking real. 5) Australia suffered 8,709 casulties, but the Turks lost 86,000 so obviously we were evil for killing more of their troops What the fuck are you on??? 6) Australians shouldn't feel any unique connection to Gallipoli because there were troops from many other countries there too FUCK YOU 7) We have to dispel these myths as soon as possible, to prevent the Evil John Howard using them to send Australian troops to fight Iraq Okay just fuck the hell off right now. 8) The ANZACS should not be called heroes. Like fuck they shouldn't 9) ANZACS were sometimes cowards who shot Turkish prisoners in cold blood Fucking asshole 10) Using bayonets was bad because it's, like, really aggressive, m'kay? What the fuck? 11) Australians travelling to Gallipoli for memorial activities are illegally occupying Turkish land, and the Turks want to take it back No they fucking don't. Ok we all see how it works now team? I doubt it will catch on but I'm hoping to win the blogesphere prize for the most gratuitous use of the word "fuck" in a serious blog and some days you just have to shoot from the lip. A couple of things I will elaborate on though.

"The ANZACS should not be called heroes." I have always been a little uncomfortable with the use of the word "legend" when used in relation to the ANZAC's as to my mind it made it something a little less real and human. These guys were very human and their abilities and achievements are unsurpassed. An attempt by some pencil dick to steal their very real heroism makes me wish for air fare, softball bat and trial by jury.

This crap desrves little more than the single "get fucked" that I first used when Bruce told me about it. This is just another example of how out of touch and desperate the tree huggers in Oz have become and I have absolute faith in the nation that had the highest rate of volunteers in two world wars pulling more than their share in this one.

Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives .... You are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehemets to us where they lie side by side here in this country of ours ... you, the mothers, who sent their sons from far away countries, wipe away your tears; your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land they have become our sons as well.

ATATÜRK, 1934

YES, LET US ALL CONVERT TO THE RELIGION OF PEACE... ...so we can slaughter girls with knives and guns!

Indian-controlled Jammu -- Suspected militants entered a home in a Kashmiri village and brutally killed three young women, just days after posters ordered females to wear a veil. The attackers slit the throats of two of the women, both aged 21, and shot the third, police officials in the disputed Jammu and Kashmir region said on Friday.

Of course we need to ask ourselves what we have done to provoke such desperation. Almost certainly this would not have happened if George Bush had signed the Kyoto Protocol.

CRAP! GIMME A RUEBENS WOMAN ANY DAY! Voluptuous girls absolutely RULE! Curves are IN! Give me something soft and warm to hang onto on a cold night, not some stick insect! This story is wrong in every sense of the word! Dang, the explaination point key just fell off....

Men's taste in women has changed dramatically over the past half-century, shifting away from girls with curves and big breasts towards the androgynous and the skinny. The assertion comes from two psychoanalysts who pored over every Playboy from December 1953 and calculated the body mass index of every centrefold. Over 577 issues, the models became taller and their waist increased, while their hips became narrower and their bust became smaller. If Playboy is any guide, the needle on the male sexual compass has switched from Marilyn Monroe to Eva Herzigova, the scientists say. The body of evidence is a slap to evolutionary biologists who contend that men have always preferred women with big curves because of the association of breasts and hips with health and fertility.

The researchers have of course been nominated for the "Professor Frink Prize for Cheekiest Research Proposal that Actually Paid Off Mmm-ha". How come I can never get jobs like that? Well, obviously I'd skip the Norman Mailer peices where he complains about his waning libido. My ideal woman is actually Caroline Quentin. Brains, looks, and utterly cuddly. There, my dread secret is out.

CHARGE OF THE REWRITE BRIGADE The Australian Left, sensing perhaps that the cultural tide is turning against them, have decided to launch a frontal assault on the central myth of the country's national identity - the Gallipoli campaign of World War I. It's a blatant, shameless attempt to reprogram society to their own advantage, regardless of the facts. John Lack, of the University of Melbourne, has written a mendacious article in the Australian, which due to copywright laws I am prohibited from quoting from. Or linking to. If you feel like it, you can pay money to subscripe to their pay-per-view archive search service and search for "Charge of the Rewrite Brigade" Allow me to summarise the main points: 1) Australia should apologise to Turkey for the campaign 2) The Gallipoli campaign was just as bad as the British invasion of aboriginal land in 1788 3) Gallipoli was an invasion, so it was evil, m'kay? 4) If we take an Aboriginal point of view, we should try to understand Gallipoli from the Turkish point of view too 5) Australia suffered 8,709 casulties, but the Turks lost 86,000 so obviously we were evil for killing more of their troops 6) Australians shouldn't feel any unique connection to Gallipoli because there were troops from many other countries there too 7) We have to dispel these myths as soon as possible, to prevent the Evil John Howard using them to send Australian troops to fight Iraq 8) The ANZACS should not be called heroes. 9) ANZACS were sometimes cowards who shot Turkish prisoners in cold blood 10) Using bayonets was bad because it's, like, really aggressive, m'kay? 11) Australians travelling to Gallipoli for memorial activities are illegally occupying Turkish land, and the Turks want to take it back As Alastair Cooke might say: "Well". Can you hear that sound in the distance? It's political axes being ground. This has nothing to do with history, and EVERYTHING to do with trying to salvage the Left from it's current position.This is modern politics being fought out on the battlefield of history, much like the current unpleasantness over the fate of the Tasmanian aborigines, which I won't get into today. Maybe later when they've hosed some of the blood off the faculty common room wall. Let me make something clear from the outset. History that comes wrapped in a golden glow of patriotic pride, waving the flag and whistling the national anthem, deserves to be unpacked and examined closely. Much of my criticism of the Left for attempting to misuse Gallipoli for their own purposes applies similarly to the other side which has been able to exploit it's own interpretation for equally partisan objectives over the years. To change history, you don't need a time machine. A typewriter and a publisher are the only requirements. And everyone does it. Almost as soon as it's happened, you'll get an argument over what an historical occurence means. The what is usually not in dispute, but the whys and the wherefores seldom get completely settled. Take the event most of us are primarily concerned with - September 11th. We were all there, thanks to television, and we saw the same things, but so did Fisk, Chomsky, Pilger, Mobiot et al. And our interpretations of that same event couldn't be more different. If you were able to listen in to a high school class in 2103 being taught history, which version of September 11th would you prefer to hear? Actually, if the lesson turns out to be in Arabic, and there are no girls in the class, do me a favour and shoot me now, okay? My point is not that history is being used for political purposes, it's ALWAYS political to some degree. The question is what sort of politics will be used in interpreting our past? Now from my history lessons, this is what I've managed to work out about the Gallipoli campaign. Winston Churchill had a wizard wheeze up his sleeve which he felt might knock Turkey, a key German ally, out of the war. An amphibious invasion and swift occupation of Constantinople, the capital. Not an entirely stupid idea, and if it had actually come off, could have shortened the war by three feet, six inches. The landings took place amidst fairly typical British military twittery, i.e. they were a Mongolian Cluster Fuck. Most of the troops fighting there were British, with Australian and New Zealand units prominent, as were French and other contingents (including Newfoundland, not at that time part of Canada). Some fought very well, some fought poorly, some were heroes, some ran away, orders got lost, maps were wrong, the enemy was a lot tougher than expected, some guys behaved well, others didn't, mistakes were made...it was a freaking WAR, okay? In the end, the assault didn't achieve any of its objectives, and the troops had to be withdrawn. The withdrawl, by the way, went bloody brilliantly. Churchill took it all very personally, and never lost his obsession with attacking Europe from the Mediterranean, going on to become something of a nuisance for Eisenhower in the closing stages of WWII, constantly suggesting an invasion of Greece, or Yugosolavia, or somewhere else in the general vicinity. Gallipoli became a defining moment for an emerging sense of nationhood in both Australia and New Zealand. We had fought in our own units and shown that were were not simply Englishmen and Scotsmen living on the other side of the planet. ANZAC Day came to be the Australian and New Zealand day to memorialise soldiers. It's precise meaning has changed with the times, but always it has meant dawn services, the verterans marching with their medals, and a rememberance of what our freedom has cost in the past. None of that is open to reinterpritation, although clearly there are a few politically-inclined academics who think otherwise.

I'VE ALWAYS SAID OUR IMPORTS WERE BETTER QUALITY THAN OUR EXPORTS It is with no little pride that I can announce that Australian pin-up girl/actress Isla Fisher is converting to Judaism! Admittedly it seems this may be a prelude to her marrying Ali G, but I suppose one must take the rough with the smooth.

Although Fisher won't confirm any of the rumours about their upcoming nuptials, she is obviously smitten by the comedian. "I miss my boy," she pines. Depending on which British tabloid you read, Fisher and Cohen will wed this month in Perth after she has converted to Judaism. However, Fisher says she has no plans to return to Australia in the near future. Although she remains coy about whether she is converting for Cohen, she says she will be taking "a long holiday to meet friends and family" in Israel, where many of Cohen's family reportedly live.

Judaism - not only do we make great tanks, we're starting to get the babes as well! Convert now and avoid the rush!

I HAVE A SIMPLE RULE If I find myself actually clutching my body and howling with laughter over something I've just read, it goes up on the blog. With that, here is Laurence Simon's current side-bar intro, with animated Santa:

Due to a clerical error, Santa and Hans Blix got their lists mixed up. Across the globe, naughty kids were interrogated by the FBI on Christmas while Santa got to work on the Smallpox Egg Nog.

And further down the page, Laurence did it again! Two zingers in the space of five minutes! Where does he get the money? I could write things just as funny, it's just that...ah...I don't want to.

JERUSALEM POST: Palestinian planes to fly pilgrims to Saudi Arabia Welcome aboard Palestinian Airlines flight 3 from our brutally oppressed and occupied territory that will one day be drenched with the blood of Jews and paved with their crushed skulls to Abdul Aziz Airport in Jeddah, Kingdom of Saudi Arabia.This is the DC-9 aircraft with the latest in safety features to protect us from the evil Zionist aggressors. Please take a moment to review the Koran in the pocket in the seatback in front of you to familiarize yourself with the lack of safety features in this aircraft. Seven emergency exits are located throughout the aircraft... two in the front... two in the middle... two in the back... and the gaping hole in the floor that's covered by duct tape and plastic bags. In the event of a hijacking over water, your cushion may be used as an explosive device.

ATTENTION ALL ACW WARGAMERS

Looking for a good quality online head to head game? Go and see the team at Tower Games and play Line Of Muskets. The games support from 2 to 5 five players. The staff there are online to help you out and they have a good quality, easy to play simulation. It is pay for play with online tokens but they have a free game, a free tutorial and a free solo tutorial. They use Java and you can get it while you're there, don't give Bill Gates more money that you have I say.

These guys have done some good work so go and check them out.

JUDAISM - CHRISTIANITY ON STEROIDS? None of this candy-ass "Prince of Peace" nonsense or PC "turn the other cheek". And as for the grovelling "Render unto Ceaser", screw that! Judith Weiss points us to a reconfigured Carol which better suits today's martial spirit. Maccabees are Coming to Town by Eric Schrager. (To the tune of "Santa Claus is Coming...") They're grinding their swords Sharp as a pin A guerilla war They're going to win Maccabees are coming to town You'd best be a Jew Or suffer your fate It does you no good To assimilate Maccabees are coming to town They know if you're Assyrian They know if you dig Greeks They see you on the temple mount Consorting with Hellenistic freaks You'd best be a Jew Or suffer your fate One day's worth of oil Is gonna last eight Maccabees are coming to town In the interests of fairness, I should note that the Hasmonean dynasty which was installed as a result of the Maccabean revolt was, without a doubt, the most incompetent, fratricidal and self-destructive reigime the Jewish people have ever inflicted on ourselves. And that includes the last Netanyahu administration! Just pray there isn't another one.

HEY KIDS! WANT TO BE BORED BEYOND BELIEF? Buy some of these jaw-droppingly stupid politically correct games and attempt to "play" them. But don't think you can win, the fun lies in....in....er....well, maybe fun is optional.

The games are being marketed by a Sussex-based company, Gaia Distribution, [well of course they are!] and are designed to feed children messages of a more educationally nutritious nature than just "winner takes all".

As opposed to real life in which the winner....er...takes it all. Well they shouldn't! It's wrong! La la la, I can't hear you.

In fact, many of the games are played not on a competitive basis, but a cooperative one, so that no one ends up on the losing side and there are no tears either before or after bedtime.

And kids will want to do this because...?

Reach a paving stone next to a patch of bare soil, and you can plant one of the 48 vegetable discs from the nursery. But it must be a species that is compatible with the one planted alongside it - in other words, it's all right to put a beetroot beside an onion, but not next to a tomato.

Species-ist! This is a typical example of right-wing "factual correctness" run amok! All species can live together in peace and harmony! Kumbaya, my lord, kumbaya...

The end of the game comes either when all the vegetable rows on the board are filled with crops that are complementary to each other - or else when the pests have become so prevalent that no more planting is possible. "In that case," concludes the rule book, "no one individual player wins or loses the game, and everybody is happy or disappointed with the work done."

Or out of their tiny minds with boredom. What do YOU think?

Aware that this concept may at first be alien to children weaned along win-or-bust lines, the makers print an encouraging slogan on the box reading: "Let's give it a try."

Let's not. In the name of all that's holy, let's not.

Many of the products are variations on familiar themes. For example, the card game Tree Quartet is an eco-version of Happy Families; instead of Mr Bun the Baker (plus aproned wife and two doughnut-shaped children), you have the Norwegian Maple. To collect the full set, you need one card that is a picture of the tree, one that is a drawing of its leaves, one that shows its bark and one showing what the wood looks like when turned into floorboards. The same goes for the other eight tree families in the pack - all "part of an extended arboreal family, in that each of them is a strictly temperate-climate species".

Well, that's the final nail in the coffin of the Playstation AND the X-Box. Who on earth is going to want to play "Hitman 2" when they can spend an afternoon identifying tree bark instead?

The memory-testing game of pelmanism (trying to locate pairs of identical cards) comes in many different Gaia manifestations. However, instead of cards with matching numbers, you are looking for cards showing the same tribal mask or Tanzanian painting or statue from the Reitberg Museum in Zurich.

Or a matching pair of brain cells in the skulls of whioever thought for one second that kids would want to do this. Have PC parents become so utterly preoccupied with what's ostensibly good for their children as opposed to what's fun that they might force this sort of nonsense on their loinfruit? Apparently so.

As for Cluedo, the Gaia alternative is called Nature Detective, in which you have to track down the mystery animal by piecing together the foods it likes. Whereas in Cluedo you finger Colonel Mustard as the culprit in the ballroom with the lead piping, in Nature Detective you deduce that it must be the squirrel with the nuts and berries in the oak tree.

And won't we all squeal with joy when little Jasper, Felix or Barnaby announce this! Followed shortly afterwards by "Although an ice-pick would have been more effective". Meaning more trips to the therapist, the environmentally sustainable, co-operative games are clearly not working.

At present, most of Gaia's business is done via mail order, rather than retail. "Our sort of consumer is interested in the angle these games provide," says Renee Elliott, [her lip curled in leftist distaste for 'ordinary' people, far beneath her elevated political conciousness] founder of Planet Organic, a London shop that stocks Gaia's Garden, Tree Quartet and Kambuka, the Tanzanian version of pelmanism. "At the same time, though, they've got limited advertising behind them, so they're not going to take the world by storm."

You think? So, we have a set of products with next to no appeal, coupled with bugger-all advertising. Clearly a winning business strategy. Ooops, I used the word "Win". Looks like I go back six spaces and have to give my hemp jacket to the next player to my left.

While they have yet to attract crowds of Hamleys-type proportions, the Brunners are quietly branching out into puzzles and children's toys - including little Indian-made "put-put" boats, made of recycled drinks cans and powered, somewhat mysteriously, by teaspoons filled with candle wax. "We are constantly searching for new ideas," says Carme Brunner.

And God knows you need some. If anyone needs me, I'll be playing Hitman 2. The answer is: Me, with the sniper rifle, crouched on the balcony. Yeah... Link via Junius by way of Andrew Ian Dodge at La Blogatrice.

WELL I WOULD NOT GIVE YOU FALSE HOPE... New Zealand Khmer Vert MP Keith Locke, on the other hand, is a horse of a very different colour. Like a blowfly finding a fresh cow-pat to settle on, New Zealand's favourite terrorist-coddling idiotarian Tribune of the Plebians, has decided to make sure that none of those nasty policeman are hurting poor widdle Algewian gun-wunner Ahmed Zaoui, currently enjoying Her Majesty's hospitality at New Zealand's maximum security prison.

Ahmed Zaoui's lawyer says Green MP Keith Locke should either cough up and help the suspected terrorist - or apologise for giving him false hope. The Algerian was now hopeful strings may be pulled for him following Mr Locke's visit on Monday to check on him in Paremoremo Prison, his lawyer, Paul Coates, said yesterday. Zaoui knows he is considered by New Zealand authorities as a high security risk and potentially extremely dangerous so has interpreted the visit by an MP as a positive sign. "He believes that there's been an about-face by the Government in their approach to him because of a visit by an MP. "I visited my client yesterday and he informed me that he can't be seriously regarded as a terrorist by the New Zealand Government, because what member of parliament will visit a suspected terrorist to see how he is?"

Poor old Keith "I never met a blood-soaked assassin I didn't like" Locke seems surprised at the reaction. Heh heh heh...

However, Mr Locke says he promised Zaoui nothing: "That is not what I said." He had visited him the way he visited many asylum seekers - to check on their treatment - and is surprised at the controversy. "I certainly didn't wish to by my presence give him any expectations at all about his case. That wasn't my aim at all. I was obviously concerned because unlike other asylum seekers he was being detained in a very strict prison situation."

Gee Keith, do you think perhaps it might have had something to do with the international terrorist watch-list the guy was on, the fact that he tore up his South African travel documents on the plane, his links with Algerian Islamic terrorists, with the slovak machine guns and the knives and the summary executions and the blood and the hyman maven...?

Mr Coates said because his client came from a part of the world where corruption and bribery of officials and politicians is par for the course, he may now think someone had paid to have strings pulled for him. "That's pure speculation on my part..."

Yes! Green MP in corruption probe! Locke denies bribery! Possibility of money changing hands cannot be ruled out! Probe urged! Resignation inevitable! Speculation mounts! Okay, it's bullshit, but no more or less that the stunts the Left pull on conservatives every day from sheer reflex.

MURRAY'S JOKE OF THE WEEK Ok here it is, apparently the fact that my computer shit itself and just sat on the bench humming at me like a deranged, yet useless oversized bumble bee is no reason to not blog. I'm actually too busy trying to reinstall everything to be meaningful, inciteful or even randomly abusive (yes THAT busy). BUT! I have come up with what, for the sake of argument, we shall call a joke. Product of my own deranged imagination. I defy you to to find documented evidence that it came from anywhere else, but I also have a bet with Bruce that there will be claims that it was passed about camp when Ceasar was still in a short toga. Ok people, this is as PC as I've ever been so stand back hm hm hmmm... How many New York firemen does it take to put out a burning Islamodick who accidently set himself alight while trying to burn an American flag? It depends how hard they stamp. Thank you I'll be here all week... or until they Greens find out where I live. Go forth my pretties and spead the words so that others may claim them as their own.

THIS IS WRONG ON SO MANY DIFFERENT LEVELS Okay, here's the situation. We (the good guys) are being portrayed by the enemy (Islamofascists) as racist bigots. If the enemy can show that we are attacking Muslims out of some religious animus, they will be able to strengthen their support base among Muslims. So. What do we do about this? We deny Muslims the right to build a prayer centre in Sydney on the grounds that...well basically because we don't want Muslims in our neighbourhood. Smooth move, cretins!

A Sydney council will be forced to defend in court its refusal of a development application for a Muslim prayer centre. Baulkham Hills Shire Council denies its decision to ignore the advice of its own planners and reject a development application to build the three halls and parking for 62 cars in Annangrove was racially motivated. [ ... ] A motion of the deputy mayor, Mike Blair, said that the application had failed to meet objectives of rural zoning, was incomplete, was not in accordance with "the shared beliefs, customs and values of the local community" and, if approved, would lead to changes in the character and amenity of the area. The sheer number of submissions and expressions of fear in those submissions also warranted the centre's rejection. The council received 5170 submissions objecting to the development and the 11 in support. These had come from 532 households in the shire.

I dunno, sounds like redneck bigotry to me. I thought we were supposed to trying to get Muslims on-side with how fair and neutral and colour-blind the Western system is supposed to be, and here we are apparently scared of a prayer centre. What if this issue was about a synagogue and the same thing happened? I for one would be violently pissed off and deeply alienated! As would pleasant little incidents like this.

The council's decision has come as a double blow to [the applicant, Abbas] Aly . Last Friday night, the three-bedroom home which was to have been eventually demolished to make way for the centre was trashed by vandals. All its windows were smashed, along with bathroom tiles, and the house was sprayed inside and out with "obscenities".

Thanks a lot guys, this really helps the cause a lot, thanks for stopping by and making us look exactly the way Osama wants us to. Would I be indulging in unjustified speculation if I suggested that this was the work of bogan westies with mullet hairdos and girlfriends called Raylene and Sharon? Of course I would, it would be quite wrong of me, so I shan't. Just for the record. This is wrong in every sense of the word, stupid, and it plays directly into the hands of the enemy.

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER The Conservative Observer links to Silent Running. Kudos for your good taste!

Silent Running today has a fascinating story linking such high profile themes as the Algerian War, the current mess in Alergia with the FIS (Algeria’s Islamic Salvation Front), the harkis, political asylum, war crimes, and oh-so-many lovely topics! The entry will go very well with strong coffee and my two blogs of today, “Killing Freedom of Speech” and “Torture in a Good Cause: The Case of General Aussaresses.”

Quite good stuff.

MY ENTRY IN THE "TRENT LOTT WEASEL WORDS" CONTEST When challenged, do you confront the issue directly? Or do you try to slide past it and hope no-one notices? In my previous post, I noticed that I myself appear to be guilty of following in the soon-to-be-former Senate Majority leader's footsteps, with this rather masterful example of spin and obfuscation.

I don't think I drectly labelled this particular incident anti-semitic, but it seemed to fit a pattern...

Coming up - I use the phrases "I have no clear recollection of that event" and "I apologise if anyone feels offended by anything I may have been reported as saying". Can I be Senate majority leader now please?

IS IT ANTI-SEMITISM IF A JEW DOES IT? The St Cloud University situation has been previously mentioned here. Questions have been raised about whether the latest incident constitutes actual anti-semitism though.

Uh--wait a minute. Two Jewish professors got pissed off and attacked the non-Jewish students for flying the Israeli flag in a non-sarcastic or insulting way? Yeah, Tom, there is something off on that post. I'm seeing two asshole professors and no anti-Semitism.

Meryl Yourish raises a valid point here, in the comments section of my earlier post. Mark Miyake's opinion on this is simple.

Uh ... yeah. So if I'm a pro-Palestinian Leftist and if I fly the Palestinian flag, do you think Palestinians will lunge at me? I suspect not.

I don't think I drectly labelled this particular incident anti-semitic, but it seemed to fit a pattern of anti-semitic activity and attitudes on the campus. However, fresh information from a previously little-known source (at least to me) sheds new light on that.

The original anti-Semitism case was settled out of court for foolish reasons -- the defense lawyers botched the discovery, the administration here and in St. Paul were weak-willed. One of the plaintiffs got aced out of a t-track job and took it out on a lawsuit by recalling some insensitive comments made; another was embroiled in an academic fraud case and played tag-along. Follow along to my homepage to cover more of that.

Indeed, for the most complete coverage of this issue from all angles, nothing beats having a blogger-on-the-spot, and Mr King is certainly that. His blog should be the first place to go to for information on this whole SCSU thing. And seeing as I'm making snap judgements from 12,000 miles away based entirely on third-hand news, maybe I'll just shut my big mouth. Mr King, on the other hand. is definitely one perceptive cookie.

Q. But what if attorneys for the College Republicans file suit against the SCSU, claiming that their plaintiffs were damaged by actions that went beyond even the level of discrimination and harassment . . . to that of assault and battery? A. Oh, the answer then is simple, really. We need only look at this past year’s lessons to learn what must be done. The first objective of any SCSU Administration must be to SETTLE the issue out of court, no matter what the cost. The public must NEVER find out if there is any truth to the allegations. Q. And couldn’t our administrators also rationalize that there must never be an admission that any TRUTH even exists? A. Precisely so! After all, TRUTH is colored by the eye of the beholder, and we must embrace diversity in all its forms, including the existential right to seek and find TRUTH however we want. It’s truly a beautiful manifestation of any university’s policy that expands its multi-optical horizons.

THE DOG ATE MY HOMEWORK And if you believe that, maybe you'll swallow this pathetic excuse for an excuse from the South African Health Minister about why her country can't afford to buy anti-AIDS medication for its citizens.

South Africa cannot afford drugs to fight HIV/Aids partly because it needs submarines to deter attacks from nations such as the US, its health minister said. Manto Tshabalala-Msimang told the Guardian that budgetary priorities meant her department could not provide anti-retrovirals to the estimated 4.5m South Africans with HIV. "We don't have the money for that. Where would it come from?" Asked if it could come from defence savings from leaving out the submarines which formed part of a £4bn arms deal, the minister said that South Africa needed to deter aggressors: "Look at what Bush is doing. He could invade."

If I were prime minister of South Africa and a vast number of registered voters were dying of AIDS and my health minister tried that line on me, I'd have the bitch dropped down a lift-shaft. Then I'd get to work on her. Link via Country Store.

YOU WANT US TO WHAT? The head of one of the worst terrorist organisations in the world, one responsible for uncounted thousands of butal murders of civillians, including women, children and babies, is demanding that New Zealand grant one of its members residency! UNBELIEVEABLE!

The head of an extremist Algerian Islamic organisation wants Immigration Minister Lianne Dalziel to give suspected terrorist Ahmed Zaoui political asylum in New Zealand. Islamic Front for Salvation (FIS) head Dr Mourad Dhina has written to the minister confirming that the man being detained under the Immigration Act at Auckland's Paremoremo prison is Ahmed Zaoui, a leading figure of the former Algerian opposition party banned after a military coup in 1992. Dr Dhina said Zaoui was a peaceful person in no way linked to terrorist activity. "Mr Zaoui is definitely an endangered person," the letter says. Dr Dhina said Zaoui was afraid for his life because of the "brutal repression" of all FIS members and deserved to be given asylum in New Zealand.

In a pig's ear it does! The Algerian civil war has been waged with unparelled savagery on both sides, and anyone involved in it is soaked in innocent blood up to their armpits. And that's not neccessarily a metaphor.

Former Algerian officers of the French army, who initially fought the Algerian "rebels" on the French side before rallying them, find themselves once more engaged in mortal combat, with French backing, against the same "wretched of the earth." Detention camps, used by the French to incarcerate nationalist militants, were reopened in 1992 in the Sahara desert and filled with thousands of Islamist militants. Self-defense militias organized to "protect" villagers from terrorist incursions resuscitate the notorious harkis set up by the French under the motto: "To hunt the wolf of Baluchistan, use the dog of Baluchistan." And for the first time, on August 29, 1997, the number of men, women and children reported to have been slaughtered in Rais by armed bands in one day reached the record figure of 300 "Messalist traitors," including children, massacred in one night in Meluza in 1957 by the National Liberation Army, the armed wing of the National Liberation Front (FLN). From butchering entire families of "traitors," to razing guerrilla hideouts with napalm, to engaging in terrorist bombings in France, the tragedy is strangely reminiscent of Pierre Joseph Proudhon's "révolution permanente." Irrespective of its ideological articulation, the crisis is shaped by the familiar patterns of violence and counterviolence, retaliation and retribution, generated by the pursuit of thwarted political goals by deadly means characteristic of the unconventional nature of the struggle. Indeed, the conflict cannot be expected to obey sophisticated Geneva Convention "laws of war." George J. Andreopoulos's penetrating observations pertaining to the Algerian-French war are transposable to the new Algerian war: "One of [its] most disturbing features is the indiscriminate use of violence as a means both of instilling fear in the enemy and of rallying supporters to the cause." The targeting of innocents (children or spouses of security officers, for instance) inevitably provokes repressive measures of the same indiscriminate nature, in a spiral of violence leading to a new "form of total war, a war waged not against the guerrillas but against the people as a whole."3 The ultimate result is that both sides have succeeded in alienating the very people on whose behalf the struggle is relentlessly waged.

I know what you're thinking. This little incident might be some sort of dry run by the Islamofascists, to see if New Zealand might be a place they can send some of their people if things get too hot for them. You know, test the system, see what the response is? On the face of it, he REALLY doesn't seem to be the sort of chap I want living next door to me

Interpol and other security agencies worldwide have been helping New Zealand authorities to investigate the identity of the man who was picked up at Auckland Airport early last week. Dr Dhina is an Algerian physicist living in exile in Switzerland. It has been reported that he lost his job at the European Nuclear Research Centre in 1998 after he was linked to trafficking in Slovak-made machine guns. It was also alleged that he used internet facilities at the centre to contact members of the GIA.

Slovak machine guns? I thought the Czechs made better weapons. Hmmm, poor taste in armaments - another strike against him

DOUBLE STANDARD ALERT A good point is made by Michael Graeme in "Redneck Nation: How the South Really Won the War". It's reviewed by Rod Dreher in NRO.

Five toothless goobers get together in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, and rant about establishing a white Christian nation and it's a full episode of 20/20, but hundreds of thousands of Muslims gather each week to discuss the proper context in which to kill the infidels, and it doesn't even make the Metro section of the New York Times. I'm not making the pathetic "The only group you're allowed to hate is the straight, white Christian male" argument. I'm glad to see the media hammer fall every time the pointy, empty head of the KKK pops up. But how did we end up with an America so attuned to divisive ideas that calls for tax cuts are denounced on the floor of Congress as racist 'code words' by Congressman Charles Rangel of New York, but a mosque full of Muslims can openly support terrorists who target Israelis and nobody notices?

Why is it that our vigilant news media elites seem to give Islamofascists a free pass to advocate mass murder in public? If Jim-Bob and Bubba get so much as look sideways at a federal office building, they're appearing on CNN in a tasteful orange jumpsuit with matching chains and handcuffs. Not that that's a BAD thing mind you...

AH...MENTIONED IN SONG AT LAST! God bless Silflay Hraka for a superb blogger Christmas Carol. Never mind the number of Jewish bloggers mentioned, we'll just sit here and play with our dreidels...

Meryl's got a spare holiday On Christmas day, on Christmas day. Cause she made dreidels out of clay On Hanukkah day in the morning He woke up in a Cold Fury On Christmas day, on Christmas day. Driving his rig to Missouri On Christmas day in the morning. And Andrea is feeling mean On Christmas day, on Christmas day. Someone gave her an extra spleen. On Christmas day in the morning! They're Running Silent, running deep On Christmas day, on Christmas day. 'Cause Down Under talk isn't cheap. On Christmas day in the morning!

NEW KID ON THE BLOCK His name is Rohan "Trevalyan" Thavanathan, and he's one of Rottweiler's blogchildren. It shows.

I love girls, puppies, girls kissing puppies, Iranian university students, and the thought of Saddam Hussein's head on a pike in time for my birthday.

Stick around kid, you're going to go far.

IS ST CLOUD UNIVERSITY A BAD PLACE FOR JEWS? More evidence that the answer is yes.

"On December 11, 2002, the Saint Cloud State University College Republicans held a kiosk in the Atwood Memorial Center on the campus of Saint Cloud State University. The College Republicans held the kiosk as a means of showing our support for Israel in its fight against terrorism, as we felt that the pro-Israeli opinion is not often heard on campus. The kiosk displayed a 39-page list of the names of all of those killed by terrorists from Jan 2002 through Oct 2002. It also included a display, which profiled some of the terrorist groups operating in and around Israel and Palestine and some literature that symbolized Israel’s right to defense and self-preservation. Above the kiosk flew a replica of the Israeli national colors. Two professors approached the kiosk and said that because of their Jewish faith, they found the booth offensive. They specifically pointed to our display of a replica of the Israeli colors and said that because those of us at the kiosk were not Jewish we had no right to fly the Israeli flag. During the ensuing debate, one of our members, Mr. Zach Spoehr, took a photograph of another College Republican member. One of the professors, Prof. Rona Karasik, told Mr. Spoehr that she would break his camera if he took her photo. Mr. Spoehr said he had not taken her picture and also said that Prof. Karasik has no right to break his camera. She then lunged for the camera and Mr. Spoehr backed away. She lunged for him a second time, grabbed him by the throat with both hands, and slammed him against the wall. I then escorted Mr. Spoehr away from the scene. Mr. Spoehr has informed the Saint Cloud State University College Republicans that he has filed a complaint with the Saint Cloud Police Department. The College Republicans support Mr. Spoehr’s personal decision to do so.

St Cloud is the campus which has been in the news recently over repeated accusations of anti-semitism, not doing enough to combat anti-semitism on campus, and targeting staff who tried to do something about the anti-semitism on campus. Nice people. Maybe it's time for some sort of Freedom Ride, maybe we could organise a few busloads of Jewish students from New York to head on up to this bastion of Jew hatred in Minnesota and forcibly integrate it.

And just how many boxes of Cracker Jacks did you have to go through before you found a liscense with your frikkin picture on it, pieface?
Bill, a fellow blogger residing on the southside of the arena of the first clash of the ironclads (Hampton Roads), strikes a familiar nerve with his commentary on the driving habits of those in the southeastern most corner of the Commonwealth. And if the year round regulars aren't fun enough, every couple of months, the US Navy is kind enough to contribute approximately five to seven thousand swabbies that haven't operated a motor vehicle (with wheels) at all during the previous 6 months or so. Bill hit the high points, but he left out a few things. Herewith, a list: Other reasons Virginia drivers slow down - - The HRBT (Hampton Roads Bridge Tunnel). They may go through it, like, tommorrow. And its all narrow and, golly, scary. - passing Williamsburg headed south on I-64. Its a state law, don't ya know. Don't pay any attention to those misleading speed limit signs that all look the same. - There's another car. On the opposite side of the highway. Headed the other way. In the far right lane. And its a green one. - To hang right in the blindspot at either the 7 or 5 ocolock position of the car they just overtook, and you were waiting for them to pass, so you could go around their 66mph in a 65 left lane drivin ass. - To hang in the blindspot at the 5 or 7 oclock of an eighteen wheeler because they're a fearin to pass the big, big, scary truck. - Did I mention the tunnel? - Because someone hit their brakes. Way up there. About a half mile ahead. - The optical illusion that people 3/4 of a mile down the road aren't going as fast, so they'd better slow down, too. - Somebody just changed lanes in front of them, despite the lane changer going at least 15-20 mph faster than they are. - Someone is (------)ing into traffic. I had to use dashes, because the native Virginian drivers don't believe there is an English word spelled M E R G E, much less that it actually means something. - VDOT's latest 6 year construction charade, usually with weekly changing lane markings within 300 feet of some major artery confluence (five to six lanes into 2. At the VDOT pace, LA would STILL be repairing the freeways from the earthquake, that was how many years ago? In not one, but TWO recent projects, they must have gotten WAAAAY too far ahead of schedule, so they deconstructed nearly completed bridges, to build them over again (Jefferson Ave overpass, and the Busch Gardens exit in WMBG). - Because they spent at least 30 thousand too much for their designer name SUV, and you are just plain rude to expect them to get their pompous and ignorant asses out of the left lane that they paid good money to go and clog up. And yes, Meryl, I'm sure the traffic is MUCH MUCH worse in the greater NY area (everything bigger, worse, better, etc in Gotham). Like I said though, negotiating Boston, in a rental, from Logan, at rush hour, was not nearly as excruciating as driving around here on a 'normal' daily basis. Yes, I know, whenever it gets too excruciating, I can always toodle on off to Northern Va, timing my passage through Fredricksburg northbound for around 7:30AM to experience maximum annoyance at the I-95 parking lot. So far, I've driven in: LA, Boston, DC, London, Riyahd, Japan, SanFran, Texas (drive friendly!), and most States in the Southeastern US. Worst drivers - Atlanta. They don't just have NASCAR stickers, they treat them like sponsorship badges they are desperately trying to demonstrate they deserve to hang onto. Haven't seen a boneheaded trick anywhere that I haven't seen either first or executed more stupidly than I have in Hot-Lanta. They home of 'hey ya'll, watch this!' in action.

YOU'VE HEARD OF CRAZY HORSE? MEET HIS DESCENDANT, CRAZY FUCKING LOON Oh terrific, now we've got the goddamn Indians on our case as well. Ok pilgrims, let's get those Arks of the Covenant in a circle!

A respected Saskatchewan Indian leader said Friday Hitler did the right thing when he "fried" six million Jews during the Second World War. "The Jews damn near owned all of Germany prior to the war," [David Ahenakew, a senator with the Federation of Saskatchewan Indian Nations] said in an interview. "That's how Hitler came in. He was going to make damn sure that the Jews didn't take over Germany or Europe. "That's why he fried six million of those guys, you know. Jews would have owned the goddamned world. And look what they're doing. They're killing people in Arab countries."

Perhaps it's time for another of those treaties that last as long as the rivers run and the grass grows - or til next Thursday afternoon, whichever comes first. Here, have some free blankets... Meanwhile, Our Glorious Leaders in Canada are displaying the resolution and intrepidity that have become synonymous with Jewish grit and determinaton.

In comments one local Jewish leader described as unfortunate...

[Sigh]. Where do we GET these 'Jewish leaders' from, a box of crackerjacks? No, no, no, he's got it all wrong. You're supposed to look the guy in the eye and with a rueful grin, say "That was.......'unfortunate'..." This is usually followed by the traditional "Goodbye Mr Bond". Look, stand aside, let ME do it...

MADNESS! Stephen DenBeste thinks he's managed to locate the Tranzi brains trust. The good news they write comprehensible English. The bad news is they're crazier than...than...than one of Dan Rather's mataphors!

"Entering the new millennium, I submit for discussion a proposal for the improvement of the human condition: namely, that everyone should be paid a universal basic income (UBI), at a level sufficient for subsistence. ... a basic income would serve as a powerful instrument of social justice: it would promote real freedom for all by providing the material resources that people need to pursue their aims. At the same time, it would help to solve the policy dilemmas of poverty and unemployment, and serve ideals associated with both the feminist and green movements."

Even Stephen, normally a precise and loquacious user of the English language, can only stand, slack-jawed, at the insanity on display. At least at first, but being Stephen, he recovers well. Please bear in mind that many of these people quoted are actually permitted to roam free in the community. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Kiwi Art
...And support for their movie industry More proof that Murray lives in the Shire. How many toes ya got, Murray? (link via Sgt Stryker)